Wednesday 1 July 2009

Expanding sentences

A way of writing good and interesting stories is by writing detailed and showing sentences. This site shows you how a simple sentence turns into a detailed showing paragraph.
  • Click on the site and you will see the sentence with shaded words.
  • Click on the shaded part and see how the sentence expands.
  • Keep clicking and reading until there are no more shaded words.
Thank you to Nik Peachey for sharing this fantastic site

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale,
It was fantastic the first time I do it it was difficult and I didn´t understand a lot when I readed but the second time I understuded, It was very good for my practice, I like this practice a lot, I can´t don´t say this but it was quite difficult the when you do it several times you get the hand and easier, but to have to by easier you have to practice a lot, I think soo!!
it was helpful this post I like it a lot, very much, it was fantastic to write the word to underline and all that.
Well I didn´t like when I have the noutise that we are not going to have school, because what there are doing is wrong they have to close all not only the schools,
well,
SEE YOU ON FRIDAY
KISSES
CHIARA F 6C

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale!!!!
We think this is very good because it is going to help us in our showing paragraphs!It seemed it was never going to end!!And from a little sentence I made tea (or something like that) a lot of things came out!!
It was very equal to the ones we did at school about the nagry teacher,and the room was a mess!
After reading the whole paragrhaps we find it more interesting!!
Keep Blogging this great stuff anf games!!!
See you tomorrow,
xoxo
Good Bye, Jose G.M from Monteith and Carla Dayan from Brown(6a rocks ,hah)

Anonymous said...

Hello miss ale this was very funny and messy at the same time because whenever I thought I had made all the words more and more words appeard, this was a little thing that made me quite desperate, but I still loved the fact that when you clicked the word it expaned into more and more, forming an extensive paragraph with many details. Some words were really difficult and I helped myself with the dictionaty, this made it much simplier. I like really much this kind of games because it looked very much like making magic with the mouse!!! and I really like magic, I am very similar to the cavernicolas in the movie Night in the Museum because they really liked magic. I hope that you keep on posting this good games that entertain me very much...
See you, I have to go and help my mother give Isabella a bath.
See you tomorrow
Domi
ps: I sent you the photos
Kisses

Anonymous said...

Hi miss ale,
Again it was a tennis day, adn the first thing I do when I get home is go to the blog to se what great post the teacher had posted.
This page was extraordinaly very good!!! I like it very muhc this of extending sentences so that our stories are much longer and detelied. For my opinion this techinque use the writers so thats why their stories are longer that the ones I do, adn using the same idea. For all the ones that see these post, is going to be great help. I don't belive that from a cup of tea you could do a parragraph only saying that you served a cup of tea. I lager it the most you could and then what I did is that I read it all, to see what where the changes the person invented this changed. What difficult work does the one whoe did this had!!
Thank-you for posting really good post that help us very much
See you of friday(and then...)
bye bye
tomas j

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale!
What a creative post, i liked it a lot... Maybe somepersons must have taken it like a game, but i feel it is a great excersie that excersise our minds. This will help is to do longer and more discriptive stories and paragraphs. At first i started to suppose that maybe the paragraph ever lasting because there was always another word to click on, until i got to the final part!
I think it is amazing how "I prepared tea" can get to be;Yawning, I I and smearing my eyes with my fingers, I walked walked bleary eyed into the kitchen and made made myself boiled the kettle. filled the kettle. took the kettlegrabbed the kettle, unhooking it from the cord and filled it.. I filled it with fresh waterI turned the tap and drew fresh water, making sure it was cold enough checking with my hands to make sure it was cold enough () (The best tea comes from the coldest water!). I filled the kettle as I glanced outside at the mistoutside for a minute across the city mist. I could taste almost taste the grey. I got some biscuits. The kettle was full so I plugged it inThe kettle was half full, so I switched the tap off and returned it to its socket. I turned it on I flicked the power switch on and got some biscuits out.looked for biscuitssifted through the cupboards, looking for biscuits. Anything Anything above loose crumbs would do. I Thankfully I found some fusty digestives. Biscuits For some reason, biscuits are nicer always nicer when they're they've gone a bit dry and stale. I took the milk out of the fridge. I took the milk out of the fridge and poured some into a mug. I reached over and opened the fridge, retrieving the milk. I got a mug and poured some milk in. I poured a little into a mug at the same time as grabbing the mug from the cupboard and placing it on the surface. This This is a technique I developed that doesn't really save any time, but makes me feel clever. Then I made myself The kettle began grumbling fiercely so I poured water on to a teabag so I took it from the cord, threw a teabag into my cup and poured boiling water onto it and watched it brew. . I watched swirls brown swirls rise up and through the watermuted white of milky water. A few minutes passed. I put the teabag in the bin. I removed removed and squeezed the teabag, then flicked it into the bin. I picked up my mug and left the kitchen with teaa cupnice cup, hot cup of tea strong tea.
Really amazing isn't it?? I really think so. Ja Ja...
If you compare these two peaces of writings you can observe many thins, like:
1. That the second peace of writting is much more discriptier and bigger.
2. That the first peace of writting is like a show and the second one is like a tell.
3. That when you read the second paragraph you can't believe that three words were convertied into all that!

Well it was really fun commenting your post and doing this kind of excersie, keep on having all these great ideas....
XOXO
Maartuu.P
ps: Sorry for copy-pasting the paragraph, i just wanted everyone to be able to compare it!
Ja Ja

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale, I saw the site and clicked on the shaded words. I can´t belive three, four words, can make a paragraph with 120 words, aprox. It is incredible!!!
the blog is great...keep on posting
ps: will the vacations of Sepetember be cancelated?
xxx
meli b

Anonymous said...

Hello Mis Ale,
This is a really good post, it is really intresting to see how the sentence "i prepared a tea" changes into a big paragraph. Well this post is very good and the blog is great, keep posting posts like this one!
Bye
Francisco

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale,

It's fantastic how that short sentence can expand so much!!!!I think it's great, but I think it's a little bit difficult. But although, I like it a lot. The first time I open it I only wanted to click more and more, and in the second one, I started observing and detalied and seeing the changes.

See you tomorrow if the school is open, although we don't have with you,

Ramiro Sa.

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale:
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!!!
It is amaizing how a simple scentence as I drunk a cup of tea(I think) can be made to a houle LARGE paragraph. I could do it, but only if I had lots and lots of time. When I saw the post I thought that it would be, that the words shaded would transform the sentence into something longer, but then they were not shaded again. But it was not like that every time I clicked on aword that was shaded another word or wordS appear, at one moment I thought it would never end. Imagine that we all did from that little scentence all that paragraph, it could be good in some way because we will all be excelent writers, but in other way it will be bad, because we would write in EACH story about 50 pages each person, we would have to change our ink very often and you would have lots and lots of pages, about 80 pupils x 50 pages each.
byeeeee and excellent post!!!
sofi 6c
PD:I say again WOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale,
I really liked the post! I am surprised with only the little sentence of I want a cup of tea! And it made to a paraghraphe of 20 lines,( I am VERY excagerreiting ehh) JAJAJA! Well, I thhink no? how you can make a really large sentendes? Only, adding adjectives and words? Or something else?? Now, I realise that people like to write showing sentences, because it is more funny and nice. All though readers understand much more the telling sentences. And, you have a VERY BIG problem, if the writer doesnt make a picture or photo in the readers mind! We have to practice this a lot, because it is very difiicult, even for me! ajajaj! Weel, I really likedd the post! Now, I understnad much better, the differences beetween teh telling sentences adn the showing sentences!
The post helped me a lot! Thank youuuuu!
Kisses and take care!
Beluuuu D Monteith 6b\
PD: I dont understand, are we going to have school teh September HOLIDAYS??

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale,
This is great!! I think it is like show and tell. With 3 words you could do a very big paraghraph.
Keep on posting,
Santi.G

Anonymous said...

mis ale
its incredible when i thought it would end i had to keep on clicking its a great game.
xoxoxoxoxooxoxo
mili.s

marina said...

HELLO MIS ALE:
ist great how we could see that the words went expanding more and more and when you tell us in class to include more ideas in our sentence and sometimes we say that we cant, well this proves that we can so im going to keep trying to include ideas in my sentences etc, this also can help us in our writing etc, well great post miss ale
xooxoxxo maru.s

Anonymous said...

Hello Miss Ale,
It is very good this of the showing sentences and how only a very little sentence can transform in a very long sentence. I could not understand it very well, better that you can explain it to us,
Bye Miss Ale,

Agustina F.6c